It's night 33 in Survivorland Brazil. Debbie has gone home to her middle school students (well actually over to the jury but that doesn't sound very dramatic). Coach is in shock, having just realized that he is not actually running the show after all. The others cushion the blow by telling him that they saved him and that Debbie wanted him voted out. Coach is grateful. Coach is stupid.
The next morning the conversation turns to who should go to Exile Island next. Coach doesn't really want to go because he has suddenly and unexplainably, after 34 days, contracted asthma and back pain. Of course the Dragonslayer is willing to go if he must, but he would much rather send Taj or Erinn, fierce competitor that he is. Privately JT tells us that Coach should go to Exile Island. JT wants Coach weak for the immunity challenge so that they can vote him out.
Dimples introduces the reward challenge. With feet shackled, Survivors must race through a maze. Once through the maze they must construct a pole long enough to retrieve a sandbag suspended on a rope. They must then swing the sandbag and hit three targets. First to hit all three targets wins reward, an overnight trip to the Governor's retreat, complete with real beds, a shower and a feast. JT wins this challenge easily and chooses Coach to go to Exile Island and Stephen to accompany him on the reward. Before Coach heads off to Exile Island he tells the others that he is going to choose the monastic approach and not take any food or water or build a fire during his stay on Exile Island. Erin takes offense and tells Coach exactly how stupid his monastic approach is. He really just wants to be a martyr, says Erinn. After the confrontation JT is obviously angry with Erinn. He tells Stephen that "people are so dumb in this game. They talk way to much".
So the men-folk head off in their various directions and Taj and Erinn are left at camp. Far from feeling left out Erinn and Taj are enjoying the peace and quiet. Erinn tells Taj that she feels guilty about her tirade against Coach and hopes it will not gain her votes in Tribal Council. On Exile Island Coach is talking, and talking, and talking about how this will be a vacation, he will suntan, no food or water, no wishy washy no-character people around. He will take a spiritual journey in the manner of his ancestors the Cherokee (I'm pretty sure anyone of Cherokee ancestry is wincing during this segment). As coach fashions himself a dragon's cane he congratulates himself on getting the last word against Erinn.
At the Governor's retreat JT and Stephen are flown via private plane to a secluded wicker-furnished paradise. When they walk into the fully equipped bathroom they are both aghast at what they see in the mirror. Beards. Bad hair. Cruddy teeth. Whatever happened to the glamour of television? After a shower the two are led out to enjoy a bbq Brazilian style, which seems to consist of meat, meat and meat.
On day 36 we see Coach lying on the beach half submerged in the water. He has had no sleep, no food and no water and it has been awesome, he tells us. Yet he limps into the immunity challenge with his dragon cane like Christ carrying the cross to Calvary. Taj privately tells us that Coach is a drama queen (gee and I thought I was the only one who thought that!). The Immunity Challenge, Dimples tells them, involves two vertical posts. Survivors must brace themselves with their hands on either post and keep their feet on narrow footholds. Every 15 minutes they must move to narrower footholds. The challenge comes down to a mano et goofo between JT and Coach. Coach finally caves, falling to the ground and needing to be revived by the others. His back has been in spasm for the last 10 minutes, he tells us, bravely forgoing treatment by the medics. He is such a brave warrior, isn't he?
Back at camp JT has had a change of heart. He tells Coach that he, Coach and Stephen will vote for Erinn. Privately, in the first break between Stephen and JT, Stephen tells us he is not certain who to vote for. At Tribal Council Coach goes on another rant and reads a poem he has composed, causing much eye-rolling amongst both jury and tribe-mates. When Dimples counts the votes it is Coach and not Erinn who is heading over to the jury (where I am sure we are destined to hear more of him during the final vote). Stephen has cast his vote for Coach and not Erinn.JT looks, for the first time, like he has just realized he is not in total control. As Coach wanders over to the jury, so does Lisa from our pool. Thank you Lisa for bravely riding the roller coaster that is Coach. Rick is one of a small group who is sad to see Coach go, since he picked him to win (and I wouldn't let him change his vote). We are now down to four survivors. JT (Pat), Stephen (Lynn), Erinn (Cheryl and Selina) and Taj (Marie). Sunday is the finale. One of these four will be eliminated at Tribal Council and the remaining three will throw themselves on the mercy of the jury. Until Sunday...
Outwit, outplay, outlast
Pat ( aka JT did I almost throw Taj under the bus in favour of Coach Thomas)
Thursday, May 14, 2009
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